Random Rant

Forgive me for this randomness!

Hi! I'm Zia (16) at this age falling in love is just normal (Heck! Even 7 years old fall in love nowadays) anyhow. I am a girl who finds too much perfection on a person. Yes, I had been in a lot of relationship but that was only out of "Curiosity" not out of "Love". I was just trying to blend in the community (I was a closet-otaku back then, before I met my "Right" friends) Ever since I let out my "Weirdness" I had been picky with my relationship

I am an amateur writer, I write stories or more like stories i want my life to be like, I picture out the right and perfect relationships but it just never happen. I guess this is what I get for asking so much on a relationship

I only fell in love "Three" times but had been in over 20 relationship (at least the decent onces)

To be honest I wasn't even in a relationship with the "Two" the "Third One" one oh well, let's just say I had admired him at first and said "Yes" out of randomness but fell in love with him within our relationship (But we broke up, Things aren't just working out, I guess this so called "Love" didn't last at all. We did stay as Just Friends though, Just That)

But I had never been with someone that I really like, I found my perfect type but the divine intervention is there, I just can't cross the line between friend zone (unless I want to change my name into "Ron" if you get what I mean)

And now I am liking someone and is already assuming about things, but I am asking for the impossible really impossible the day that OUR thing would probably work out is on the 30th day of February!
See? that's how impossible things are, but i just hope things would just be healed by time this current case of mine is pretty similar with the "Second One" but unfortunately things didn't work out for me and "Second One" and things between us and "Second One" is even more productive than this current situation

I maybe too young but I just want to meet my fated person, the person's red string that's attatched to mine, I just want to feel this sensation of "Love", I just wanted to have warm affection that I "once" had from my parents, I just wanted to feel that there is still a purpose for me to breathe, I want to live for someone i held so dear